Has anyone completely lost it on their toddler.. cause I did and feel awful

My toddler was pretty awful today.. she threw all her breakfast on the floor, screamed and refused to get dressed, peed in her underwear and I couldn’t get her to school.. it threw off the whole morning/nap with my 18m old. I couldn’t do timeout because my husband works from home and is next to her room and doesn’t want to hear her scream while in meetings. So I feel like I couldn’t punish her and make her realize her behavior was inappropriate. So instead I had to keep her downstairs while she screamed and yelled and wouldn’t listen or do anything I asked. I eventually lost it on her and screamed and showed how upset I was at her for the behavior but now I’m so scared I traumatized her. I eventually ignored her yelling and just tended to the 18m old until she calmed down but again felt like maybe I didn’t handle it well.. hopefully I won’t be shamed but just needed a vent and hopefully told I’m not awful for loosing it today 😭