Extreme Pain with Penetration - Looking for Advice & Experiences

I recently got married, and I've been struggling with extreme pain whenever we attempt penetration. I've never had sex before, and every time we try, I experience unbearable pain and a deep sense of fear. Because of this, we haven't been able to have sex at all.

At this point, I feel like I also have a psychological block- i shudder at the thought of penetration and have started to despise the idea of trying. We've consulted multiple doctors, and they've ruled out any anatomical issues. They advised me to use dilators with lube, starting from the smallest size, but even that feels painful, and I can't bring myself to do it.

If anyone has experienced something similar, I'd really appreciate any advice or personal experiences on what helped you overcome it.