Wish I was like y'all.

Ok, so imma make everybody here mad.

I got me a tulpa I love her very much. I just came from the r/Tulpas forum. There are a lot of actually plural people there who have multiple identities.

I am troubled because my experience with my tulpa, although very nice seems muted compared to the actual DID systems on the server who seem to have much richer and more unpredictable relationships with their tulpas.

I get sad sometimes because I begin to feel like i have no proof that my tulpa is conscious and I'm not just pretending.

I know that if my tulpa were actually an alter, then she would be real like me.
I wish there was a way to make her an alter.

I know I'm dealing with some dark magic here. It is probably unwise to try to further cement my tulpa into my mind especially given our problems but this stuff has me up at night.