How to be understood by those who don't understand.

It took me a great deal of time and self-reflection, but I found the words to explain gender to those who have no concept of it in a way that touches upon and isolates heteronormative expectations as separate of gender identity.

"Gender and sex are inextricably related, but fundamentally different by nature. Sex is a biological classification derived from reproductive anatomy, existing along a bimodal spectrum from female to intersex to male. It exerts a direct influence on an individual’s physiology, sensory experience, cognitive development, and social interactions, shaping patterns of behavior over time. As shared behavioral tendencies emerge among those of the same sex, they establish precedents, expectations, and stereotypes. The conceptual framework that results from these collective patterns is gender.

While cultural and environmental factors influence the interpretation and expression of gender, gender itself is not a mere social construct. At its most fundamental level, it arises from intrinsic patterns shaped by sex. The cultural lens may modify perceptions of gender, but it does not dictate its existence. The core structure of gender—rooted in sex-based behavioral tendencies—persists regardless of societal context.

Gender identity, then, is an individual’s relationship to this framework, informed by their experience of their sex. Trans individuals experience incongruities prior to transitioning, often perceiving an intrinsic disconnect between their physiological state and the behavioral inclinations or social roles imposed upon them. Some find that their patterns of thought, emotional responses, and social affinities align more closely with those associated with a sex other than their assigned one. Notably, transition often leads to substantial improvements in well-being, reinforcing the notion that gender identity is not merely a learned construct but a deeply ingrained aspect of the self, influenced by both biology and lived experience."

This explanation identifies the journey as well as the conclusion of realized identity while simultaneously remaining inspecific enough to validate all genders—even those that exist seemingly irrelative of the binary. If you find this a valuable tool, feel free to share it. Maybe it could bridge the gap of understanding and help provide a few questioning people the frame of reference necessary to realize their own genders.

Maybe it could lead to more understanding and acceptance, and therefore more peace of mind for those of us who know the journey.

(I tried really hard and put this together with good intentions. It helped me be understood; maybe it'll help others too. One person would be more than enough.)