I feel like I'm sinking

Idk if writing here will help but I feel like I'm really struggling rn.. Struggling to log my hours for work to get paid, struggling to clean & declutter my apt, struggling to get rid of anything because I don't know if I'll use it in the future now that the US is entering a trade war, struggling to take care of myself. I feel like I have no motivation, the loneliness & isolation is killing me but I also have a hard time being in groups of people. I tend to embarrass myself & say embarrassing things I wish I wouldn't. No one checks in on me, is reaching out to me Or responding back anymore. I walked to a coffee shop with my dad yesterday but that's about it. I want to be held but I don't have that, so I just feel like I just want to sleep forever. This has been such a socially awkward month & now I think my mom is giving me the silent treatment. I'm hurt by the lack of care & complain so many people seem to have. I tried to switch to signal & then everyone acted like I was crazy for suggesting to switch our convos there. It's like, if people aren't willing to talk about & stand up for what's right, I can't understand being compliant. I can't ignore that the US is on the radar for the next world genocide. I have checked in on people & said hi but when no one is reaching out, I feel like I never mattered and it hurts a lot. Thanks for listening.