I'm struggling with being in love but not physically attracted to my boyfriend.

I'm a long time listener and a first time poster, so hopefully this all reads okay. I've heard lots of good advice given by Morgan & guests so I'm really hoping to get some of that good advice.

So, basically I (22 F) am really struggling with not being physically attracted to my (25 M) boyfriend.

Me and my boyfriend have been together for a bit over a year now. We met on hinge and there was such a strong connection from day one, we just clicked. A lot of our opinions about the world, morals and future goals (especially around family) aligned. Yes, we spoke about all this within hours of meeting eachother, but like I said, it just clicked. I felt so safe with this man, so comfortable, and his smile is so sweet, just makes me giggle.

Now, within the first couple weeks, I realised I wasn't overly attracted to him physically. He's a larger man with quite a large and round gut, big enough that it sticks out enough to balance things on while he sits, and to hang out of his shirts when he stretches or puts his arms up. He also didn't seem to have much care for his health, drinking excessively when he did drink, and kindof eating like a glutton (lots of fast food). All of this paired with little to no interest in physical exercise, active activities and a passion for sitting at the computer, had me worried.

I spoke to friends and family, and came to the conclusion that I might’ve been acting pretty vain by not giving him a chance because of this. So I went along, I didn't say anything, and spend time getting to know him.

I can now say I am very much in love with this man. He makes me smile and brings me joy, he's my biggest cheerleader, my biggest supporter and my rock. I look forward to seeing him, spending time with him and how much fun we have when we're together. I also see us having a future together. We've spoken about plans and what our future together would look like, and it feels to me like we're both looking forward to it.

But I just, can't seem to shake this unnatraction to his body and how he chooses to treat it. It's even started to affect me and my behaviours. My life has become more sedentary, I've been eating more fast food myself, and it's resulted in me gaining weight. Now there's nothing wrong with going up a couple sizes, I understand our bodies are always changing. However, I'm no longer comfortable in my own skin and, it's a problem for me. I know it's my responsibility to care for myself, but it's hard when our time together is us lying in bed and eating fast food.

Every time I see him now, I'm filled with this joy and excitement, like my inner child is all giddy. But then we sit down, the excitement fades, I look over, and get just a little uncomfortable with how he looks, and that I'm dating and committed to someone like that. It's the same when he gets up and stretches and his stomach hangs out, I just get a little grossed out.

We do have a sex life, however he has a low libido and struggles with the stamina needed to have the kindof sex I crave. He does still make me c*m, quite well I might add, but I do want us to have a more active sex life.

Within the last few weeks, I decided to bring it up to him. I've been sitting on this for so long, it was starting to really bother me, and make me question myself. So I brought it up, telling him that it bothers me how he treats his body, and that I'm genuinely concerned for his health. He's on track for a Type 2 Diabetes diagnosis any day now, and I don't want that for him. He told me he appreciated me speaking to him about it, and that he knows he lives an unhealthy life. He said he 'wants' to be healthier, but doesn't actually want to make the changes needed to live that life and that he's not sure he wants what a 'healthy lifestyle' looks like.

I'm worried. I want a future with him, I love him, I care about him, but it's hard to think he's going to slowly kill himself and I'll just sit by him watching it happen. I'm really worried. I'm also feeling a lot of conflicting feelings around this because of how much I do love him. I don't want to break up with him because of how much I love him, but I just don't know if I can be with someone longterm who chooses to live the way he does.

Please reddit, is there any advice on how to move past this? Do I break up with him and break both our hearts? Do I make an effort to force him to change, resulting in me treating him like a child? Or do I just keep going like nothing is happening and sit on these feelings, hoping they'll go away? I'm just so conflicted and unsure what to do. I'm hoping for some advice on how to navigate this situation.

TLDR, I love my boyfriend as a person deeply, but can't move past his unhealthy body and lifestyle. I don't want to break up, but I'm struggling with these feelings. Help!