It's day 5 and the demon is calling me

Been using Elvanse/Vyvanse for three years almost daily. Started off with 30mg and after a year or so upped to 30 + 30 / day.
For months I've been feeling like the drug is sucking away my soul and turning me into a zombie. Sleep was awful and waking up required the magic pill.
A few weeks ago I started to feel some chestpain and heart palpitations even at rest. Legs started swelling and I had shortness of breath. Went to the ER to find out that my BP was 197/110 and EKG showed some minor anomalies. Doctor recommended to quit/taper down the Elvanse and I agreed to give it a try.
Went down to 20mg / day for a while and then decided to try cold turkey from there. I didn't get anything good from the 20mg, only the horrible feeling of being tired as hell but not being able to rest.
It's day 5 now and I just walked past the pharmacy (2min away from my place) and the cravings are crazy. My brain is trying to tell me that I'm not going to manage my school project that's starting today and I'll be forced to drop out etc.
I'm not sure what I'm trying to get by posting this, maybe just needed to vent it out.
Greetings from Finland.