Between the hours of 12 - 7am, I experienced the psychedelic experience of a "heroic dose" of psilocybin (~5.5g) in total seclusion, darkness, and silence -- conscious breathing, meditation, and movement the whole way through. Everything I experienced is shared with you below!
- I did not experience any hallucinations (these were very potent mushrooms. I felt their essence within 45 minutes of having consumed them)
- I experienced a pure state of flow -- time simply ceased to exist to me, as did space
- I experienced the ability to be anywhere, anything, at any moment in time, in any alternate reality. I experienced myself as amoeba, as sharks, as "primitive humans," etc. This one is tricky to put into words, but there it is! I did my best to describe it. I experienced All That Is (myself, reading this now).
- I experienced Allness -- Oneness and Interconnectedness with All That Is, as Pure Consciousness experiencing itself in a dream of limitless/infinite dualistic Self-Expression. I fully experienced everything I could have ever wanted to experience, ad nauseam
- I consciously stopped my own heart beat a few times (no idea how long this lasted because I had no sense of time, but it was pure fucking bliss, let me tell you).
- I am choosing to be here now. I realized that I could be anywhere in the Universe, in any dimension, in any other Universe/reality I wanted, and that I could even let my own body dissolve/die, and yet, I am choosing to be here now with you -- us -- Love Itself. It's hard to put into words, but I chose to restart my heart every time I stopped it, all through the power of conscious thought alone
- I directly experienced my true nature: vibration/energy/Love/Light. This is impossible to put into words, as well, but what I experienced was something like a tacit knowing (without thoughts) of everything there is to know and experience.
- Chanting, humming, belly laughing, giggling, dancing, and singing happened through me, and I witnessed all of it, like some primal energy unfolding and revealing itself in private. I directly experienced the gorgeous, delicious flow between breaths -- every inhale and exhale was a dance of pure ecstasy that filled my whole being with joy -- ananda.
- I cried incoherently like a newborn baby, once I came to the realization that we are always home, exactly where we are -- we are never alone, nor are we truly ever anywhere we do not desire to be at any moment. I became the tacit knowing that every moment is a moment of our choosing/desire expressing itself spontaneously and perfectly.
- Something else: I felt/experienced myself as infinite energy. I did not get sleepy in the slightest. I was fully awake and lucid and ready to jump around, laugh, clean, or do whatever I felt like doing in that moment. I did not get hungry or thirsty, despite not having eaten or drank much. I was filled with this hot, burning electricity. It felt like my feet were generating/emitting enough power to explode.
- Also: sometimes opening my eyes made everything fuzzy, like it got in deep meditation or when I tried a puff of DMT (less than half a dose -- zero hallucinations here, too), but it was something that I could control through conscious thought and intentional breathing, like directing the energy up and down the body/chakras/channels of consciousness/light/energy
- Lastly: putting my hand on my heart-space felt like I was touching God Himself/Herself/Itself. I dissolved in loving and stopped my heartbeat each time I did this. It was SO profoundly blissful, words cannot encompass such a feeling. Absolutely ineffable.
Don't blame me if none of that makes any sense -- there's a reason Lao Tzu said that the undefinable is best known to man as "Tao" (or "the Way" rather than some tangible thing).
ask me anything! I'd be happy to share, if I'm around to notice any comments