Life falling apart

25M soon going to be 26. Completed my MBBS in 2023 and since then I've been unsuccessfully attempting to get into PG while many of my friends are about to complete their PG courses including guys who were below average compared to me in their UG career.

Had been through 1 breakup just after internship which had affected my preparation and since then was trying to concentrate solely on prep but somehow fell for this one girl last year whom I had met online. She too showed signs that she was into me and as we were preparing together and connected well, thought we'll get through the exam together.

She did, I couldn't. Now she recently joined residency in another city, initially was in touch but now not so much. She's an emotionally labile girl and since her department is hectic and toxic, most probably she will get into relationship with a co-PG or somebody else through trauma bonding. I know these are immature and lame thoughts but the thought of her being with somebody else is shattering for me.

Now I'm literally just months away from the exam and these are the thoughts going on in my mind: jobless feeling, friends progressing in their lives, one heartbreak after another, loneliness and total uncertainty.

I have no idea what to do next. But if I don't study properly again, I will spiral down even further.

This entire thing is too suffocating for me. I hope I somehow get out of this mess soon.