How was ur suicidal ideation on keppra

I want to off myself LOL. I’ve been on keppra for 4 years and I think I’ve just handled it because I’ve always been taught to shut up and handle things, but I’m literally just crying in my car thinking about how I want to just stop taking my meds and sleep for like three days straight, or just not wake up. I feel so trapped and alone and sick of everything I want to just run into the woods and be eaten by a coyote but I know my family would tarnish my name in death lol