This feels so lonely

We had yet another fight where I pointed out how alcohol contributed and does on a regular, almost nightly, basis. It's like he doesn't even hear me anymore when I say it. He doesn't respond to it, or he'll tell me drinking has nothing to do with it and move on to the things I did wrong that contributed to the fight. I know I am not crazy and I haven't been imagining this same thing for several years. Recently he's started blocking communication and not being home more often when we fight. It feels like there is absolutely no way for me to be heard anymore when I try to tell him how he is towards me when he drinks. I keep saying I don't know where his bottom will be or how bad it needs to get for him to just finally stop. There have been so many relationship and legal issues for the last 2 years and we've got fresh new legal issues to deal with because of his behavior. I feel like a hypocrite though now because I don't know where my bottom is with this either. Every time a bad thing happens, I think I'm done...and then I can't walk away. I have no idea how to get over this hump, I don't know how to get un-stuck. I am not ready to leave, this is just honestly where I am at right now. I am also incredibly hurt and sad and I feel so alone in this right now. He used to be such an amazing man with me and for me and it feels like that man just disappeared and is never coming back to me. This is just so lonely.